I have been determined not to talk about the gigantic elephant in the room, coronavirus. Honestly, do any of us need to talk about it anymore? The only reason I am bringing it up, is that today, I finally accepted this as my new normal and got my shit together (sorry to those who don’t like profanity). Today is technically my third day in isolation. I was home all day Sunday, but worked on Monday. The library was hopping, as people knew we were going to be closing up for the foreseeable future. I was able to load up on books and DVDs with a due date of May 1. A due date that far into the future really put things into perspective.
Yesterday, my son was laid off from his job. Two weeks ago, this kind of event seemed impossible. He has a job on campus while going to school full time. His school is now online, but his job seemed stable. He is maintenance and works alone. But, the university has it’s first positive case, so he was laid off. Thankfully, something literally came up within a couple hours and he started today. It’s sounds like a company that is taking necessary precautions. He needs the work not only for the money, but also for the mental health. He was feeling really down, like so many of us. Going to work will be good for him during this time. I will constantly worry about him being out and about, but he takes the precautions seriously.
Last night, I fell sound asleep at 10:00 and slept until 8:00. Ten hours of sleep is pretty much unheard of for me, so it’s obvious that a little bit of depression is setting in. That’s not a shock, I spent two days watching TV, scrolling Facebook and CNN and going back and forth between feelings of anger, fear and sadness. Since the entire planet is in this mess, I am guessing that I am not alone in those feelings. But, I can’t go on like this. Projections are that this could go on 18 months, I simply cannot allow myself to feel like this for 18 months. So, I got up this morning and made a good breakfast. I got in the car and drove myself to the local county park that has trails and took a 4 mile walk. I spent that time listening to music (Journey) and thinking about all this. I spent the last mile on the phone with my mom. Neither of us cried, but I think we both realized that it could be a really long time before we see each other again. That is a hard reality to face.
I have spent the afternoon making candles. I also put some almonds in the crockpot with spices and siracha sauce. I am not sure how those are going to turn out. I will only post the recipe if they are edible. They smell terrible, but I hate the smell of siracha so that could very easily be the problem. The candles turned out well though and I have been meaning to make some for awhile. I made lavender lemon for myself and a couple of citrus scented ones for my daughters.
Eric and I started watching Malcolm In The Middle again on Hulu. Thank goodness that show exists. We laughed very hard last night and expect that Malcolm will get us through this situation we are all in. I have also started to watch anything by Judd Apatow. The 40 Year Old Virgin on Monday night was just the medicine we needed. I say that during this event, let’s not worry too much about whether or not something is offensive, if it makes you laugh, just watch it.
Let’s remember we are all in this together. For everyone of us who stays home, that’s possibly 10 less people who get infected. It’s going to be worth it the end of this journey, it’s just going to be really hard to get there.
The view on my walk. It was cloudy, but it was outside.